As the primary elections are heating up, Cuzco would like to remind all of you good people that you don’t have to choose between bloviating Elephants and asinine Donkeys. Choose the moral high ground! Vote for the Goat!

Cuzco has a lot of experience on the campaign trail and would like to remind everyone that in the one and only political contest in which he ran, he won a landslide victory not only for Homecoming King but also for Queen, despite the fact that he did not even run on the “Queen” ticket!

Cuzco is excellent at browsing through the issues to arrive at the best option.

However, he refuses to be bribed or swayed. (Cuzco sniffed this flower but he DID NOT INHALE!)

Cuzco is especially good at listening to people’s concerns.

This goat’s winning ways can persuade even the most stubborn dissenter.

Even if their beliefs are downright shocking.

Cuzco is the kinda guy who you can really see eye-to-eye with, and you always know he’s leveling with you.

And Cuzco always gets the women’s vote!