Sadly, only a week after his first spring brushing, Cuzco’s hair inexplicably started coming out in clumps and now he’s almost bald, the poor fella! Given the current sad state of his usually glorious ensemble, there will be no “Glamour Shots” for a while. We don’t want Cuzco to be embarrassed by his nakedness. Hopefully a new coat will grow in quickly.

But in the meantime, we still have stories which are sometimes even better than photos. I got a new harness today and Cuzco wanted to try it on for size. It was a chill, blustery day and the patio where I normally tack up was slick with ice, so I figured I’d take Cuzco in the cozy basement and try the harness on by the wood stove. I’m used to bringing the girls in every morning to be milked. It’s usually a pretty calm affair: I open the basement door and the goat walks sedately in ahead of me and moseys over to the stanchion with maybe a pause here or there to investigate something on the way.

But Cuzco is not a sedate kinda guy. Purely out of habit, I opened the door for Cuzco like I do for the girls without first haltering him or even grabbing his collar. I might as well have opened the door for a tornado! There was half a box of popcorn left over from a movie last Wednesday that was sitting on a shelf ten feet inside the door. I’d been rationing it out to all the goats over the last couple of days, and it must have had a homing beacon on it. In the blink of an eye, Cuzco tore across the space, dove his head into the popcorn, and inhaled most of it before I could reach him. I tried to pull it down from the shelf so he could at least eat it on the floor (I was envisioning mouse-attracting bits of popcorn scattered behind the shelf from Cuzco’s vicious assault on the box). But this effort turned into of a tug-of-war which resulted in Cuzco’s head getting stuck inside the popcorn box.

I pulled the now-empty box off Cuzco’s head and snatched at his collar, but he was too quick for me. He whisked away and made a lunge for the shelf where he knew he’d smelled animal crackers and peanuts. First Cuzco savaged the animal cracker box. It was plastic and the lid was screwed on. It took him less than half a second to realize he couldn’t immediately access the crackers, so he tossed it off the shelf in disdain and turned to the peanuts. They were brand new, still sealed and sitting inside a shopping bag. I reached Cuzco just as he reached the peanuts. He felt my hand close on his collar and made one more desperate lunge that swept every item off the shelf into a heap on the floor.

I had hold of the collar, but when the goat is as big and strong and determined as Cuzco, and when one is laughing so hard it’s difficult even to stand up, let alone control a raging, 200 lb. beast, keeping hold of the collar doesn’t really make a difference. I “accompanied” Cuzco to the bin of alfalfa pellets where he shoved aside the big jar of Cosequin that serves to weigh down the cheap plastic cover, knocked the alfalfa bin open with his nose, and dove his entire head into the contents. He was buried up to the eyeballs and gorging much bigger mouthfuls of the pellets than he could actually chew. I clung desperately to his collar, trying to pull him out and thinking that he must come up for air eventually, at which point I would slam the lid down and hustle him away. But Cuzco knew my scheme and refused to surface. So I pulled harder on his collar in an attempt to drag him out by main force. Well, I managed to drag him out but the bin came with him. I had just filled it that morning and I watched in horror as the contents slowly began to pour over Cuzco’s head and spread across the floor.

Just at that moment, Phil, who had been laughing at this fiasco from the other side of the room, saw the desperateness of the situation and raced over to grab the bin before it tumbled over completely. I tugged Cuzco to where his halter was hanging, but before I could reach it he shoveled the lid off the metal grain can and almost pulled that one over before I hauled him out with Phil’s help. Once haltered, Cuzco knew the rampage was over and submitted immediately. He followed me across the basement to the tie pole, gentle as a lamb, and stood perfectly during the long, tedious ordeal of adjusting a new harness. That’s Cuzco… whether he’s being good or bad, he puts his whole heart into it.

Today I brushed Cuzco with the wire slicker brush. We filled an entire 2-gallon bucket with hair in about 15 minutes. It was awesome. I dumped it out in the woods and no doubt the birds are going to have a hey-day lining their nests with the warm, downy softness. I won’t tell Cuzco about the birds though. If he found out he’d probably never shed again just to spite them.

As the primary elections are heating up, Cuzco would like to remind all of you good people that you don’t have to choose between bloviating Elephants and asinine Donkeys. Choose the moral high ground! Vote for the Goat!

Cuzco has a lot of experience on the campaign trail and would like to remind everyone that in the one and only political contest in which he ran, he won a landslide victory not only for Homecoming King but also for Queen, despite the fact that he did not even run on the “Queen” ticket!

Cuzco is excellent at browsing through the issues to arrive at the best option.

However, he refuses to be bribed or swayed. (Cuzco sniffed this flower but he DID NOT INHALE!)

Cuzco is especially good at listening to people’s concerns.

This goat’s winning ways can persuade even the most stubborn dissenter.

Even if their beliefs are downright shocking.

Cuzco is the kinda guy who you can really see eye-to-eye with, and you always know he’s leveling with you.

And Cuzco always gets the women’s vote!

Cuzco always looks so lordly when he lounges around the yard for his naps, which have become longer and more frequent in his old age.

As soon as I took this photo I decided that Cuzco needed some personal attention. The other goats were nowhere in sight and I thought I could sneak out and give him some cookies without anyone else noticing. WRONG! The minute I rattled the chain on the back patio gate, I heard a rushing, crashing, trampling noise from the hill on my right. The rest of the herd came pouring frantically out of the scrub oak and reached me about the same time I reached Cuzco. I was hoping I could pamper the old goat without him having to get up, but as soon as the rest of the herd swarmed round us, Cuzco leapt to his feet to fend them off. I made sure he still got all the cookies to himself, but it was in spastic, frenzied snatches between swatting everyone else away. I wasn’t about to reward those other rapscallions for mobbing me while I was trying to share a quiet moment with our dear old Patriarch.

Nubbin is the only goat in our herd that Cuzco actually seems to like. When we take a walk, Nubbin usually stays right in Cuzco’s shadow and he doesn’t push her away. At night, she is the only goat he sometimes allows in his shed. Funny how goats’ preferences work. Nubbin’s mother, Nibbles, was the first goat we added to our herd, and Nibbles was the only goat Cuzco ever bonded with. All subsequent goats and their offspring were regarded as unwelcome intrusions on his life and were never accepted, Nubbin included. But after Nibbles died, Nubbin attached herself to Cuzco (much to his annoyance) and she never gave up. Eventually he grudgingly accepted her and now he lets her hang around. There’s a chance Nubbin may go to a new home in Idaho sometime this spring, and as much as he would never admit it out loud, I think Cuzco is going to miss her.

It’s early days yet, but I can’t wait for kidding season! I sort of tried to get a “belly” picture of Delilah today but she wouldn’t cooperate, and I’m also on the wrong side (I started off on the right side but she turned around on me!). She’s not due until April 9th, but she’s been doing the “pregnant waddle” since January.

Petunia is due May 5th, and Jezebel is due June 3rd, so babies will be spaced pretty far apart this year. That just means we get a longer kidding season and more baby goat fun for all!

Friday we took a few moments to survey the damage done by the terrific wind storm that swept over us the day before. The wind blasted in around 1:30 a.m. on Thursday and startled Phil and I out of a deep sleep. It was so loud we ended up sleeping in the guest bedroom on the lee side of the house. It only got worse as day dawned. When I first looked out the window in the morning, our goat tower was still intact, tattered American flag still fluttering gallantly. An hour later the entire top portion was demolished. The wooden shed that provided the base to the topmost spool and the flagpole was upside-down on top of my electric fence and the spool was on the ground.

After further assessment, we decided that the wooden shed is done for. It’s not worth screwing it back together again, and as this is the second time it’s taken flight in a wind storm, I think it might be more of a hazard than it’s worth. I really don’t need it winging its way across the pasture and landing on a goat like she was the Wicked Witch of the East.

Goats, of course, love any kind of change to their environment. The jungle gym hasn’t gotten so much attention in months! I should take this to heart and move a couple of the spools every other week or so, or maybe add a stump or two and then take it away.

Finn poses for the camera by standing on his sister, Petunia. Pictures don’t lie!

Petunia and Tigerlilly were the Queen and Princess of the spools respectively. They spent more time up there than everyone else combined. But that’s because they know how regal they look on a pedestal!

I affectionately call Petunia my “Pretty Pet”. I love her funny airplane ears and heart-shaped nose. When her mother, Lilly, left the scene, Petunia stepped gracefully into the role of herd queen, but luckily she’s not the vicious tyrant her mother was. Overall, we’ve had a much more peaceful herd this past year.

Princess Tigerlily! I don’t usually like white goats, but I have to make an exception for this little cutie.

Last night we had the first good snow we’ve had since Thanksgiving and we thought it might be a good opportunity to test out the snowshoes Phil’s Aunt Marianne and Uncle Steve gave us last spring. We stayed on our own property so naturally all the goats came with us!

We only had one set of ski poles, so we each took one . We mostly used them to whack at goats that tailed too closely and trod on our snowshoes. Phil was our fearless leader for most of the outing.

“You might not want to pull on that, Sputnik!”

“Shut up. It’s not funny!”

Even though she’s only halfway through her pregnancy, Delilah is really looking “in a family way”. She thanked me for taking this photo at a flattering angle. We couldn’t help but laugh at the trail her belly left in the snow. I’m so glad she was finally able to conceive. She couldn’t settle last year and we were so disappointed.

I volunteered to lead for the second half of the hike. I’m not sure Phil or the goats are going to allow this again. I took us through the brushy part of the woods. But we eventually made it back out, so I can’t be too bad a leader.

So what if this guy was a pest to Phil on our snowshoeing trek today? At least he looked good doing it!

It’s been a long time since I’ve made a post about our little angel goat. Tigerlily has really grown up and is becoming a beautiful young lady. Even though she’s more than big enough, we opted not to breed her this year and just let her grow. And grow she has! She’s nearly as big as her mother and probably heavier.

I absolutely LOVE the black tips on her ears and her “eyeliner”.

The whole family all together. Tigerlily with her mother Jezebel and her father Finn. The head poking into the bottom of the frame there is her Aunt Delilah.

It was a beautiful sunny day and I wanted to build on my great time driving Finn yesterday, so Phil and I took Finn, Sputnik, and the sled to a quiet sloped street with good snowpack. We would lead the goats up the hill pulling the empty sled and then have them pull us down the slope. They’re not big enough or old enough to pull a big load, but we want to get them used to pulling some weight and to the driving commands while they’re still young. The hill was not steep, but it was enough that Phil and I had to scrape our boots along the ground to prevent the sled from overtaking the goats, which is why you’ll see our feet dragging in most of the photos.

I started with Sputnik. He’s a flighty little goat and put up a lot more fuss today than Finn did yesterday. I spent quite a lot of time untwisting him since he would sometimes turn suddenly around to face me–a problem you have when your vehicle has no shafts. Even so, he did really well for the most part and exceeded my rather low expectations.

With Phil there to help when he got tangled and Finn to lend moral support he did alright.

Sputnik is extremely sensitive to being touched with the whip, so I had almost no trouble getting him to go. The problem is that he’s also extremely irritable about the reins and kept swinging his head down quite violently any time I tried to steer, stop, or even slow down a teensy bit. Then he would get upset by the action of the reins caused by his own dramatic movements and would swing even more. This is one goat who would probably do well in a check rein since it would prevent his being able to whip his head around to the point of upsetting himself.

Finn did amazingly well to the point you’d think he’d been driving his whole life. He already knows “Walk on” and “Whoa” after his one lesson yesterday!

We have a tandem hitch! Not really, but it sure looked like it a lot of the time. Phil likes to call the tandem a “hot dog hitch” for some reason and it makes me laugh.

Mario Andretti coming around the corner! I think Phil wants a steering wheel on this thing.

When the temperatures go down I like to haul hot water to all the critters since I don’t have electric tank heaters. It finally snowed yesterday, which makes hauling water sooooo much easier since I can load the buckets onto a sled. Well today Finn helped me! Before I had him haul water, though, I hitched him to the empty sled and took him up the road all by himself. I brought lots of cookies to make it worth his while to leave the other goats in the pen and come with me. We went up the road maybe 1/2 mile or so and when we turned around the road was downhill, so I was able to hop in the sled and drive him back to our driveway. He was a very good boy!

And since he was already hitched to the sled I decided to make him haul the water out to the troughs. He was steady and careful and didn’t spill the water even once. By the time we were done he was already beginning to know what I meant when I said “Walk On!” and “Whoa!” I hope the snow sticks around for a little while so we can keep practicing. He’s going to be a very quick learner I can tell.